RIP

So I had a turtle named Wanda. Then I killed her.

Little Wanda came straight from a bucket in Chinatown where all the classiest mini-turtles come from. My friend, Kat, gave her to me because she thought I would make such a good mommy (it had nothing to do with the fact that the turtle was mildly creepy and she wanted to get rid of her). I loved Wanda from the minute I saw her. I've wanted a mini-turtle since I was like 6 and had a huge obsession with the Ramona and Beezus shows on PBS. Ramona and Beezus had a mini turtle of their own and they were SO cool.

I was a really good mommy. I washed her cage sometimes and fed her sometimes and I said good morning and good night. She didn't really liked to be touched or looked at for that matter but I'd like to think we had a good run. Then she died and I didn't notice for a few days. Then I screamed, put her in our trash room and ran away very fast. Turns out I'm not the best mommy.

I kill plants too.